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Exploring Cremation Keepsakes

Bidding farewell to a loved one or friend can seem as if there’s no chance to maintain a lasting relationship with that individual now that they’re gone. Not having them close to you is something that truly strikes at the heart of most people’s fears about this type of situation. Cremation eliminates the task of burying an individual in the ground, as well traveling to a nearby cemetery. Not being anywhere near that cemetery can make the loss feel even deeper.

When it comes to avoiding such circumstances, cremation keepsakes like urns, wind chimes, clocks and uniquely shaped items serve as ways to help keep the deceased nearby. Each have their own way of helping remind those who are left behind that their loved one is still nearby.

Placing ashes within a clock is a way to have a daily reminder of the departed, since the ritual of checking the time is something that each of us do on a regular basis. These specially crafted items can have a photo of the deceased included so that each check of the time will include the chance to remember your loved one.

The urn offers a visual representation of the deceased’s memory, but something like wind chimes will help recall them whenever a breeze blows.

Urns are the traditional and most familiar way of holding on to such memories. They come in a variety of shapes and types that can truly capture the spirit of either the person that receives the ashes or the deceased themselves.

Regardless of whether or not cremation keepsakes such as this are what capture the essence of the individual involved, they provide more welcoming surroundings than a gravesite that might possibly be thousands of miles away. These come in options like crystal, silver, bronze, pewter, marble and ceramic.

Specific items that are even more unique can also serve as a final resting place for ashes, with some of these coming in the shape of a cross. Others can take the form of a frame. An engraving on the metal that captures the spirit of the departed is possible. This can take the form of simple birth and death dates or something more elaborate, such as a favorite quote or warm memory from the individual’s life. One other item might be a scattering tube, if the ashes will be scattered in a specific area that captures the person’s life in a nutshell.

As a cremation provider, Lifesong has served its clients with top-notch service. Each member of our staff has extensive experience in dealing with the delicate nature of the issues involved. This includes showing the many cremation keepsake options available to our clients.

Creative Ways to Use Your Loved One’s Funeral Flowers

After funerals at Tallahassee, FL funeral homes, the families of those who died face a dilemma in what to do with all the flowers that are sent for the funeral. While more and more people are choosing to request charitable donations in lieu of flowers, some people will always send flowers anyway. The spray that the family buys for the casket and the standing sprays provided by other family members are usually left at the grave site. However, the rest are given to the family to take home.

Since cut flowers die in a few days, and that may spark even more sadness as you see the symbolism of a loved one’s death in the dying flowers, try out some of these options that let you use or preserve the flowers in a remembrance of your loved one.

One creative use is to dry and frame the flowers. The flowers should be dried immediately, using newspaper, flat cardboard, or facial tissue. Next, you’ll press the flowers in paper towels and insert them between the pages of a book. Space the flowers out so they can dry completely. After you’ve got all the flowers in the book, close the book and place a heavy book on top of it.

In about two weeks, the flowers should be dry and can be removed from the book. They are delicate and can break easily, so handle them carefully as you remove them. Arrange them in decorative frames and hang them throughout your home.

You can also use the pressed flowers to make your own greeting cards, by taping them onto the cover or the inside of a blank card.

Flowers are very aromatic, so using the funeral flowers to make your own potpourri is another creative use for them. For this you’ll need the flowers, a baking sheet, parchment paper, and home fragrance oils (you can find many kinds that are not terribly expensive in places like Whole Foods or vitamin/organic stores).

Preheat your oven to 200 degrees Fahrenheit. Place a piece of parchment paper on a baking sheet. Process the flowers so that the stems and leaves are in one pile and the petals and flowers are in another. Put the petals and flowers on the baking sheet. Sprinkle 10-15 drops of your preferences of home fragrance oils on the petals and flowers. Place baking sheet in the oven for a minimum of two hours. Add more of the home fragrance oils you chose when the potpourri is ready. When it’s cooled down, put it in a decorative bowl and enjoy.

You can also use funeral flowers to make someone else’s day. Some ideas are to make remembrance bouquets to give to people who also held your loved one close as friends or family. You can also use funeral flowers by arranging them and delivering them to the residents in an assisted living or nursing home facility nearby. This is a good activity to get the whole immediate family involved in because this is good therapy for everyone.

If you’d like other ideas for using funeral flowers at Tallahassee, FL funeral homes, our compassionate and experienced staff at Lifesong Funerals & Cremations can help. You can come to our funeral home at 20 S. Duval St., Quincy, FL 32351, or you can contact us today at (850) 627-1111.

Coping with Grief: The Healing Power of Pets

The ability of pets to provide comfort to humans in times of illness or grief is recognized by medical professionals, therapists, and hospice workers around the world. People who are facing death or mourning the loss of a loved one are often calmed and reassured by the loving companionship of a pet.

Pets are known for their unconditional love, and in times of stress, many seem to know instinctively just how to respond. Loyal pets have been known to lay by ones side, attentive and patient, while they were in bed with the flu. That same kind of response can provide immense comfort in loss and bereavement. Because pets are so undemanding, a suffering human can welcome the opportunity to touch or snuggle up with a pet with absolute trust.

If one does not own a pet, animal assisted therapy (AAT) programs can help to improve the quality of life for the sick and the grieving. Developed in the 1970s, AAT’s origins can be traced to the Mayans, an ancient culture of people who believed that each person is assigned a “soul animal” as a guide through life.

AAT volunteers are specially trained individuals who bring their companion animals to homes and health care facilities to visit and interact with patients and their families who are confronting serious illness, death, and bereavement. By participating in AAT, people can benefit from contact with animals without the responsibility of pet ownership. AAT has gained rapid acceptance as dozens of studies revealed the amazing impacts of pet-human relationships.

Pets have been known to lower blood pressure, ease feelings of sadness and pessimism, and reduce the loneliness of patients in long-term care facilities. Children who have pets adjust better to the serious illness or death of a parent. Senior citizens who own pets have fewer doctor visits and reduced health care costs.

A University of California, San Francisco study published in the American Journal of Hospice and Palliative Care even found that a companion pet or animal can help a person cope with stressful life events, prevent loneliness, and decrease depression. The healing power of pets is beneficial on many levels:

Emotional Benefits:
Research has shown that people who interact with animals may experience increased levels of oxytocin. One study found that the simple act of making eye contact with their dogs when they got home from work increased oxytocin in a sample of women. On an emotional level oxcytocin helps mothers bond with their newborn babies, human couples establish a a greater sense of intimacy and it has been linked to increased feelings of self esteem, optimism and trust.

In addition to oxytocin there is some evidence to suggest that interaction with a friendly animal can decease levels of cortisol, the stress hormone, and raise levels of the feel-good brain chemical dopamine.

Physical Benefits:
Pet ownership has been linked to physical benefits such as reduced risk for heart disease, lower stress levels, fewer doctors visits, lower cholesterol, and lower blood pressure.

Again we can refer back to hormones and chemicals like oxytocin, cortisol and dopamine. Oxytocin has been found to relive pains like headaches, cramps and overall body aches. Lower levels of cortisol can account for lower stress levels and contributes to some of those heart and blood pressure related benefits.

Social Benefits:
It makes logical sense that pet ownership would reduce feelings of loneliness and isolation. Pets fulfill emotional needs like the need for love, security, companionship, and comfort. Taking care of a pet also fulfills the need to nurture and take care of a other living thing and can give people a sense of purpose.

Whether you were aware of the healing power of animals or you just realized they made you feel good, we encourage you to include your pet in your list of strengths when it comes to coping and healing from grief. If you are interested in pursuing therapy pets, contact the animal therapy program at Tallahassee’s TMH for more information about the program and how it may benefit you.

What is Advance Funeral Planning?

Advance funeral planning is the process of discussing, defining and recording your specific and unique funeral wishes with your funeral home provider and loved ones long before the services, ceremonies, traditions and rituals are needed. It is a gift to those who will be handling your affairs after you have departed. Your family will have the benefit of a meaningful, well thought out funeral — a process which is an important event for a grieving family.

Here are a few tips to help you get started:

Learn what’s involved.
There are three general components to a funeral, understanding these will help you plan: preparing the corpse, holding the ceremony and handling the interment. There are a range of options for each. Embalming or cremation? A full service at a funeral home, a graveside ceremony or a custom ceremony? Who will be there? Will there be a viewing of the body? Burial in the ground or in a tomb, or ashes scattered in a meaningful place?

Find out what average funeral costs are.
The FCA has links on its site to itemized lists of funeral costs, by state. Check it out so you have an idea of what you can expect to pay in your area for everything from a casket to the cost of that final hearse ride to the cemetery.

Shop around.
Don’t buy a funeral without checking with more than one funeral home. You can pay thousands less just by going a few miles down the road or by spelling out your wishes ahead of time. Call several funeral homes and get quotes. The Federal Trade Commission requires them to quote prices over the phone or in person.

Buy only what you want.
You may save money in areas such as flowers or plants, an urn or grave site, a casket or cremation.

Talk it over and write it down.
Tell your loved ones what sort of funeral you’d like to have, and how much you want to spend. Be specific, but realize your loved ones may not be able to deliver on everything you want. You can make the burden of organizing your funeral lessened by talking over your wishes well in advance.

Planning ahead enables you to make big decisions ahead of time and even take the burden of financial arrangements off your loved ones. Discussing your wishes allows your family to know how you wish to be honored and celebrated. Call Lifesong to discuss, document and plan your funeral wishes today.

How to Choose the Right Urn

The primary purpose of a cremation urn is to hold the cremated remains of the deceased. But what will you do with the urn once it is filled with your loved one’s ashes? The answer to that question and a few others will help to determine the type of urn you will need and help you make the right decision. Consider the following as a helpful guide in making a selection.

1. Selecting the correct size
Consider the dimensions and capacity. The dimensions of the urn are the height, width and diameter. If using a niche in a church or columbarium, call ahead to find out the niche size before choosing your urn. Some columbariums have compact niches and other columbariums have family niches much like family cemetery plots with room for larger urns or multiple urns. The typical urn size needed is an adult cremation urn. Adult size will hold the ashes of anyone who was up to 220 pounds or less prior to cremation. Medium urns are needed when dividing one person’s ashes among several people or for children. Keepsake urns are for small amounts of ashes to be kept in remembrance. Extra large urns are available for very tall or larger framed individuals — over 6 feet tall.

As a general rule for an adult urn, you’ll need an urn with at least one cubic inch of space for every pound of body weight prior to cremation. For example, if the deceased had a weight of 150 pounds before cremation, you will need an urn that is at least 150 cubic inches or larger. If purchasing an urn for an infant, child or pet, call for assistance.

2. Consider the final resting place
Families may want to consider the final resting place of a loved one’s cremation urn before looking at styles. Will the ashes be scattered or buried or placed at home or in a niche? If scattering the ashes, you may want to look at the choices in scattering urns or tubes, water burial urns or less expensive urns as the urn itself is only temporary. If you plan to have a permanent memorial in a cemetery and bury the urn, there are many options. Almost any urn can be placed in an urn vault and then buried.

3. Choosing the Urn Style and Material
There are a variety of urns to choose from. These range from brass, to wood to glass to ceramic to marble. Most people choose an urn based on a style or look they like and the end use. If the urn will serve as a decorative piece, one may choose a more unique and artistic material. If permanence is most important, marble is ideal for burial as it can be permanently marked with the loved one’s information via engraving. If traveling with the urn, one may choose a material that may be x-rayed such as wood, paper or cultured marble.

4. Personalizing the Urn
Many urns may be personalized with engraving of a name or artwork. Personalization may remind you of a loved one and bring comfort. You may choose a color or an urn that may include a photo. Some more artistic urns may have a theme or shape of something a loved one cherished such as a beach house, flowers, a pet, etc.

Apart from the most practical concerns, making sure the urn is large enough to hold your loved one’s remains and making sure the urn will fit if space is restricted, most of the choices that follow are more a matter of personal preference. Call the Lifesong team with any questions and personal assistance with choosing a cremation urn for your loved one’s ashes.