How the World Mourns Through Color

With cremations in Crawfordville, FL, you will most likely see black being worn by the family of the deceased and the mourners who join them for funeral or memorial services. Black has been used by the Western world to symbolize death and mourning since the Middle Ages.

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However, it became institutionalized during the reign of Queen Victoria (England) during the 1800’s. Very detailed ways to mourn – as well as lengths of time to mourn (men had the shortest and women had the longest, drawn in stages of months and years) – were expected of respectable people (that mean they had wealth and position).

Women not only wore black clothing, but they also wore mourning bonnets and black veils across their faces for six months after the death of a spouse. Black jewelry, such as rings and brooches, also became popular during this period, because it was considered bad taste for mourners to wear any of their regular jewelry.

Gradually everyone in both England and America began wearing black as the color of mourning.

In eastern Asia, however, the color used to symbolize death and mourning is white, which is a symbol of rebirth and purity. Buddhism is the most common religion in this part of the world, and Buddhists believe that when people die, they are reincarnated to another life. Family members of the deceased wear white in hope that their loved ones will be born again.

During the 1500’s in France, white (deuil blanc) became the color of mourning for grief-stricken children and single women. This transitioned into a custom throughout Europe for reigning queens. Mary, Queen of Scots (1542-1587), began wearing white after she lost three immediate family members in the space of a year and a half.

Interestingly, although black became the symbol of deep mourning during Queen Victoria’s reign, she herself requested that she be buried with a white veil covering her face, that white horses draw her funeral carriage, and that a white pall cover her casket.

In South Africa, the color of death and mourning is red (a color that symbolizes happiness in China and is forbidden at Chinese funerals). Red has been chosen to represent all the blood that was shed during Apartheid. It is a color that represents honor and patriotism.

Red is everywhere in South African culture, including in their flags, because much blood was shed as native South Africans struggled to the death to break free of both English and Dutch colonists.

Purple, which represents spirituality, is used in several parts of the world to symbolize death and grief. In Guatemala, for example, men and boys don purple robes and hoods on Good Friday to signify grief and to remember the agony and pain of Jesus Christ’s crucifixion.

In Brazil, devout Catholics wear both black and purple to symbolize mourning the death of a loved one. If someone is not attending a funeral and they’re wearing purple in this country, they are seen as being disrespecting and bringing bad luck onto themselves.

Purple marks intimate sorrow in Thailand. It is reserved for only widows and widowers who are mourning the death of their spouses. Everyone else wears black.

For information about cremations in Crawfordville, FL, our caring and knowledgeable staff at Lifesong Funerals & Cremations is here to assist you. You can visit our funeral home at 20 S. Duval St., Quincy, FL 32351, or you can call us today at (850) 627-1111.

Understanding the Cremation Process

When people are considering cremation and Quincy cremation services, they often have a lot of questions about what is involved, from start to finish, in the cremation process. This is because until the last few decades, most American funerals included burials. Cremations were rare, so we didn’t – and still don’t, for many people – know much about it.

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Cremation has been around for a long time and many ancient and not-so-ancient civilizations cremated their dead instead of burying them. As available land for cemeteries has decreased in small or island countries around the world, cremations have become, out of necessity, the primary method of disposing of remains.

There are two types of cremations: direct and indirect. With a direct cremation, the body of the deceased goes directly from the place of death to a crematorium. With an indirect cremation, the body of the deceased goes to the first home first.

With direct cremations, a memorial service may or may not be held at any point in time after the cremation. With indirect cremations, a viewing and funeral service are held before the cremation.

One of the misconceptions about cremations is that people can’t have a viewing or funeral service, but that is not true. The deceased is laid out in either the casket that will be used for cremation or in a casket that is rented just for the viewing and funeral service from the funeral home. Traditional funeral services with readings, music, and eulogies are held, and then the body of the deceased is transported to the crematorium.

At every step of the cremation process, respect and care for the deceased is the highest priority.

Cremation must be done in fully-combustible containers that have no metal parts. Cremation caskets are specifically built to meet this requirement, but any large container that is fully-combustible can be used.

All metal must be extracted from the body before cremation occurs. This means that jewelry, watches, glasses, hearing aids, pacemakers, and artificial joint replacement much be taken out. All of these can be donated through the funeral home to be refurbished and used for people who don’t have the financial resources to obtain these by themselves. It’s a good way to give to others in need.

Before the deceased person is cremated, the body is identified. This can be done through a current photo or by a family member at the crematorium (family members are allow to witness the cremation, if they desire). A tag that will remain with the decease throughout the cremation process is affixed.

The body (only one at a time and properly-tagged and identified) is then put into the cremation chamber. Once the body has been cremated (open flames, intense heat, and evaporation for two to three hours), all that remains are bone fragments. Once these cool, they are pulverized and returned to the family in either a temporary container or the urn that the family purchased to hold the remains (which are called cremains). These can weigh as little as three pounds and as much as nine pounds.

There are many safeguards in place to make sure that the cremation process is done with dignity and is done accurately.

For additional information about Quincy cremation services, our caring and knowledgeable staff at Lifesong Funerals & Cremations is here to assist you. You can visit our funeral home at 20 S. Duval St., Quincy, FL 32351, or you can call us today at (850) 627-1111.

How to Know When Grief is Complicated

Before and after Tallahassee, FL cremations, those who’ve lost their loved ones will grieve intensely. There is no time limit on grieving when we lose someone. In fact, some sort of grief will always be there to remind us that they’re gone, that we miss them, and that we love them.

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However, the intense grieving that immediately follows the death of someone we love eventually should change into an embrace of our memories, punctuated by those out-of-the-blue moments when something triggers grief and tears from which we move on relatively quickly, of our loved ones that surround us like a warm blanket on a cold night when we think of them.

For some people, however, the intensity of grief never seemingly subsides. There is a continual hashing and rehashing of “would have, should have, could have” thoughts about the deceased loved one. This grief is laced with regrets, guilt, and unrequited mourning. Eventually, it can consume people to the point of obsession and debilitation.

This may be complicated grief or the result of delayed grief. Quite often, delayed grief from one loss can create complicated grief in another loss.

For instance, if one parent dies and there is an adult child who’s been asked to and/or assumes the role of taking care of the surviving parent, it is likely that adult child may delay the grieving process – unconsciously – for the loss of the first parent to be strong for and available to the surviving parent.

However, when the surviving parent dies, the delayed grieving gets activated and added to the current grieving, and creates an emotional mess that may take years to recover from. It’s nobody’s fault – not the parents nor the adult child – but it Is simply the way circumstance, personalities, and temperaments come together sometimes.

If grieving over the loss of a love one is just as intense six months after death as it was in the early days after death, there is good possibility that complicated grief is involved. If a person is finding it impossible to return to a normal life, in some shape or form, after this period of time, then they most likely have complicated grief (most of the time, the person who’s experiencing complicated grief won’t recognize it, but friends and family should be aware and step in to help if there is a need).

For many people who develop complicated grief, the relationship that they had with the deceased was extremely close and extremely positive. Because the bonds of their relationship were so deep and so strong, the feelings of sorrow, sadness, and loss get exponentially intensified. It’s rare that complicated grief occurs in people who had troubled, tense, or estranged relationships with loved ones (although it does happen from time to time).

Complicated grief can also occur if people go out of their way to not think about or be reminded of their loved one or how they died. While this is self-protective initially, it creates problems if it is sustained for an extended period of time.

While anyone can have complicated grief, people who struggle with anxiety and depression are more prone to developing it.

For grief resources before or after Tallahassee, FL cremations, our caring and knowledgeable staff at Lifesong Funerals & Cremations is here to assist you. You can visit our funeral home at 20 S. Duval St., Quincy, FL 32351, or you can call us today at (850) 627-1111.

Innovative Things to Do with Cremains

Quincy cremationsAfter Quincy cremations, many people want meaningful ways to use the cremains of their loved ones, instead of having them sit in an urn on a mantel in the house. There many new and different ways to use cremains.

One way to use cremains is to have them made into memorial jewelry. Whether it’s a bracelet, a necklace, or a ring, a small amount of your loved one’s cremains are set inside the jewelry so that you can literally have them with you all the time.

Another creative way to use cremains is to have them infused into fireworks. There are specialty fireworks companies that will use the cremains and create a spectacular fireworks show that will let your loved one light the night skies.

A very nice way to help the planet and memorialize your loved one is by incorporating their cremains, using pyramid-shaped Solace Stones, into artificial reefs that are placed on the bottom of the ocean. These help create vibrant environments where sea life can grow and thrive.

Some people get tattoos to remember their loved ones after they die. Some tattooing studios now will create custom inks using the loved ones’ cremains. Then they use the inks to create the tattoo that commemorates the loved ones.

Biodegradable urns are becoming a popular option for using cremains. These urns contain nutrient-rich soil which is mixed with the cremains. A plant or tree seed is planted in the urn, and then you just plant it in the ground. Not only is new life being brought into the world, but the plant or tree is a lasting memorial to your loved one and a place where family can gather to remember them.

Another way to use cremains is to turn them into a diamond. While this may not be an affordable option for everyone, it is certainly a unique way to remember your loved one.

For music lovers, an incredible way to use their cremains is by having them pressed into a vinyl record filled with the music they loved, the music you shared together, or the music they played. Customized artwork to fit the album is created to make this one of the most unique ways to use cremains.

If your loved one’s wishes were for their cremains to be at one with water, a Viking sendoff might be the perfect way to accomplish that. There are companies that make wicker Viking ships with sails that will float on the water. The cremains can be placed inside and the ship can be set off to sail away.

Another interesting way to use a loved one’s cremains is to create cremation portraits using them. There are artists who are skilled in making these portraits, which become permanent keepsakes that you can see daily when they’re done.

You can also bury cremains. Many cemeteries allow the burial of urns in cemetery plots or have a special section, called an urn garden, where urns can be buried. This is often what happens when spouses die years apart. The spouse who died first had a tradition burial, while the spouse who died later was cremated. But they wanted to be together in death as they were in life, so burying the urn in a plot beside the other spouse makes this wish come true.

For more ideas about what to do with cremains after Quincy cremations, our caring and knowledgeable staff at Lifesong Funerals & Cremations is here to assist you. You can visit our funeral home at 20 S. Duval St., Quincy, FL 32351, or you can call us today at (850) 627-1111.