Does Death Eternally Separate or Unite Us?

Posted on April 11, 2016 by Lifesong Funerals under Uncategorized
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I remember it like it was yesterday. I had taken a nap in the middle of the day and woke up to discover two voicemails. One from my father- the other from the town Undertaker in Carrollton, Kentucky. Carrollton is my place of birth and where my grandparents resided.

Neither my Dad or the Funeral Director, David Wilhoite (who also happened to be a family friend) said why they were calling. However, I could tell by the tone of their voices and what chose not to say that my grandfather was gone from our lives forever.

I was 31 years old at the time and had already lost a couple of grandparents on my mother’s side. I went to their funerals, paid my respects and gone through the motions without a hitch. But this time it was different. This was someone close to me.

I had lived with my grandfather after high school while attending college in attempt to get my life in order. And while I was concerned about myself and future at the time, I didn’t realize I had become best friends with my grandfather. We did everything together from playing cards to fishing to raising a garden. And for the first time in my life I had experienced a devastating loss.

At the time I had been in the funeral business for 12 years. I remember being so concerned about who was going to speak, what casket he was going in, and songs to be played at the funeral that I lost focus on what was really going on-  The man I had become best friends with; leaned on for life advice and had an answer for everything was gone from our lives forever.

It took me a while to process it. I remember walking up to his casket, holding his hand one last time and thinking this is not him and life will never be the same. But I ask myself often, “would life be the same if he were still here?” And my answer is no it wouldn’t. I’m thankful he left this world without having to suffer. Yes he never got to meet his granddaughter, but he did meet my first two sons. He even got to spend a little quality time with my first (who happened to be named after his father).

But life demands to be replenished; It demands cycle and change. And God has a purpose. And as we mention him or one of his famous quotes about life to my children, they’re getting to know their great-grandfather in their own way; the same way I got to know mine. And sometimes I catch myself teaching my kids a lesson he taught me and can’t help but smile knowing he’s been right here with me all along. Does the hurt ever go away? I’d say it comes and goes as does the memories and smiles- And I wouldn’t change a thing!

Lifesong Funerals

We have nearly twenty years serving families of all backgrounds. These families turn to us in their time of need because they are aware that we are leaders in our vocation, have the highest level of integrity and are committed to providing quality service.

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